Personal Journey

Alissa Lauer

Alissa Lauer is thankful as she looks back over her 36 years on earth and sees where God’s hand has guided her and His grace has never failed her. She recognized His grasp on her life as a young child attending a Pioneer Girls Club and singing John 3:16 at her grandma’s Bible Church. At 8 years of age she accepted Christ as her Savior with a child-like faith, and not long after that chose to be baptized. She knew she wanted to live for Christ but she was naive regarding sin and the evil one. It didn’t take long to succumb to the pressures of high school and the lure of popularity.

She lost so much of her innocence during those years and compromised many of the values and standards that she held dear as a child. Much of the time she felt like a hypocrite because she knew that God had a better plan for her, yet she was choosing immediate pleasure and popularity over Him. Alissa is grateful now for the youth pastors and the Young Life leader that loved her in that place. Throughout this confusing time in her life they faithfully spoke the truth to her.

From a worldly perspective and to all outward appearances, Alissa was a “good kid” but in actuality she was troubled and hurting. She was successful in school socially, academically and in sports, but her home life began to crumble. As family life became increasingly difficult, she sought escape through partying, sports, and friends. Her parents’ marriage was falling apart and Alissa didn’t know how to cope. She felt angry and wounded because her parents are Christians and yet the choices they were making seemed hypocritical too. Unfortunately, she was pulled into the middle of their marital drama at times and witnessed some physical and verbal abuse. In those moments she cried out to the Lord and prayed for Him to protect her and her little brother, and to make the fighting stop. Even through all the turmoil and pain Alissa still knew that God had more for her life.

By the time Alissa was a senior in high school, she knew that she wanted to go out of state to school. Part of the reason was to get away from the problems at home, but the main reason she made that choice was because she wanted to start over and get real with God. At 18, Alissa moved from Colorado to Texas to go to school with two long-time friends. God led her to the Navigators ministry at Baylor and a great college group at a local church. Navigators provided one-on-one discipleship with an older college girl, and Alissa began to understand more clearly what it meant to walk with the Lord. The church she attended became a huge part of her college life, providing great Christian friends for encouragement and great teaching from God’s Word. Through this she was able to forgive her parents for past hurts as well as herself for the poor choices she had made as a teenager. Alissa was beginning to understand what it meant to live out one’s faith and be a part of the Body of Christ.

During her junior year of college Alissa met a very handsome and funny guy named Dave Lauer. He was a graduate student and though they remained good friends for the next year and a half, there was no denying that they were meant to be together. God used their budding relationship to continue to show Alissa the things in her life that she needed to release to God. Dave and Alissa have now been married for 14 years and Alissa feels that God put Dave in her life to soften her and love her the way Christ loves the church. Though she had experienced freedom and forgiveness from much of her past, the consequences of her choices and the dysfunction in her home life had an impact on their marriage.

By 2005, Dave and Alissa were the proud parents of two wonderful boys. They continued as volunteer Young Life leaders, since they knew that God had called them both to work with high school aged kids. Alissa loved the relational aspect of the Young Life ministry and the opportunities she had to share Christ with kids who might never have heard the gospel. Though she knew God was using her and she continued to grow in her own walk with the Lord, she still struggled with uncontrolled anger and submitting to her husband. Her continued attempts to “do better” only led to more frustration and outbursts. Unintentionally, she had become the high-strung, super busy, stressed out mom and wife that she had never wanted to be. She had too many commitments and not enough time or energy to be the kind of mom and wife that God intended. By the end of 2005, as she was training for a marathon, she contracted mono which would eventually set her on a path to spiritual restoration and healing.

As she recovered from the initial onset of mono, Alissa tried to get back on the treadmill to keep up with all her commitments. However, her life was still too overwhelming and she began to sleep a lot and was constantly fighting off sickness. She began to seek medical help, but things only seemed to be getting worse. Looking back, she would say that she was in denial. She just thought time would heal her body. By 2007 Alissa was pushing through life but struggling to really live. She felt disconnected from many of the people and things that she had previously loved and enjoyed. She didn’t understand what was happening and had resigned herself to an existence that revolved around sleeping as much as possible. She had no energy and felt exhausted and run down most of time. Outside of the home Alissa tried to just plug away, but the reality was that her health was deteriorating and she was becoming depressed.

Then in April 2007 the Lauer family chose to move to Virginia for an extended assignment with Dave’s job. Though overwhelmed at the thought of moving, Alissa knew that something had to change and she hoped that this would be the catalyst. God used this time to refresh and renew Alissa in a way she had never experienced before. Her eyes were opened to how sick she really was and that she needed help. Dave helped her find a clinic in Philadelphia and, through extensive testing and consultations, Alissa was diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue and Fibromyalgia and began the journey of management and acceptance. The diagnosis was a relief after struggling for so long, not understanding what was happening to her body and fighting depression as a result. God used these experiences to draw her closer to Him and to teach her more about who He is. She describes it as being slowly awakened from a deep sleep over months and months. Though the physical improvements have been encouraging since 2007, there may never be full recovery. However, Alissa can now praise God because of the spiritual and emotional healing she experienced as a result of this trial.

The healing process continued upon Alissa’s return to Boise in the fall of 2008. When Pastor Bob announced the fall session of the Healed and Set Free Bible Study for women Alissa knew God was leading her to participate. She felt compelled to do this study and from the moment she started the class, Alissa felt God’s healing in her heart and life. God has taken her on a journey from a stressed and chronically ill woman to a woman with a renewed heart for Him. The Bible says that He who has begun a good work in you will see it through to completion, and Alissa clings to this verse as she knows God is not done with her yet.

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